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13 Things PMS Stands For


1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
13. Potential Murder Suspect 

Wedding Anniversary

A husband was in big trouble when he forgot his wedding anniversary. 
His wife told him "Tomorrow there better be something in the driveway for me that goes zero to 200 in 2 seconds flat." 
The next morning the wife found a small package in the driveway. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
Funeral arrangements for the husband have been set for Saturday.

 

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