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Survivor

A shipwrecked man was barely surviving after four months on
a deserted island, when one day on the beach, a gorgeous
woman rowed up to the shore. "I've been on the other side
of the island since my cruise ship sank," she told him.
"At least you had a rowboat wash up with you," he said.
"Oh, I made that out of palm branches and coconut trees."
She explained.
"With no tools?" He asked incredulously.
"It was a simple matter of heating an unusual type of rock
I found to a certain temperature in my kiln, then melting
that into a forgeable iron to make the hardware." She told
him. "Do you want to come see my treehouse?"
Well, did he ever! This woman had an amazing fortress, and
she cooked him a delicious five-course dinner in her
handmade cookware.
After dinner, she went to slip into something comfortable
and came back wearing almost nothing. She gazed into his
eyes and said, "We've been lonely. I'm sure there's
something you want to do right now, something you've been
longing for all of these months. I think you know what I
mean." He couldn't believe his luck.

"You mean..." He was almost speechless. "I can check my
e-mail from here?!"

 

Last Chance

The passengers on an airliner were shocked when the
captain's voice announced that the plane was going to make
a crash landing. One lady, upon hearing this dire news,
ripped open her blouse and screamed to the man sitting next
to her, "Make me feel like a woman!"

The man quickly ripped off his own shirt, handed it to her,
and replied, "Okay, iron this!"

 

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